Sunday, December 26, 2010

Dad's Diary

New BabyCentre UK dad John Lewis recalls the pleasures and pitfalls of life with his pregnant wife

What am I getting myself into?

In the final months of my wife's pregnancy, people would corner me in the lift at work and say things like, "So, are you enjoying your last days?", as if I had terminal cancer. A lot of people fear parenthood as the death knell of their creative ambitions. All those distant dreams - that career as a superstar DJ! That best-selling novel! That winning goal in the World Cup final! - must become a bit more focused.

I started compiling a mental list of activities that I'd never done and now would never get round to doing. Scuba diving, inter-railing, shark fishing, joyriding, going on a Club 18-30 holiday, visiting the opera, attending a hard house night! I quickly realised that all these things actually sounded rubbish, and I for one found the notion of dividing my spare time between 'Bear In The Big Blue House' and a box of Lego quite appealing.

Besides, my sense of humour, a once noble creature, had long been reduced to 'dad jokes': making rubbish puns, putting stupid lyrics to songs and inventing crap gags, all guaranteed to embarrass my children for years to come.

I started trying this out as I talked to our 'bump' every day, and actually enjoyed it. And really boring things suddenly seemed interesting - recycling, DIY, weeding the garden, even pottering around the shed! I started to worry that I'd soon end up tucking my shirt into my underpants and shagging with my socks on.

Scary times

We both found it difficult to get excited in the first few months of pregnancy. Like many, I was a slightly reluctant dad, but even the most enthusiastic fathers will feel that the whole thing is a bit unreal. And the complete lack of any bump for the first few months led even my wife to doubt that she was pregnant at all.

There's also the very real fear of miscarriage - like many couples, we'd had a pregnancy scare a few months previously. My wife, Jenny, missed a period and tested positive. Then, just when we'd both got REALLY excited about having a baby, her periods started again. During the second (successful) pregnancy, that fear only really subsided at the 20-week ultrasound scan, when the radiologists assured us that everything was fine and dandy. It still seemed a very surreal experience, with the images on the sonogram largely meaningless to the untrained eye.

"Wow! Is that its fingers?"

"No, that's its legs."

"Oh. Is that its belly?"

"No, that's a lung."

"Oh. Is that its head?"

"No, that's the left ventricle."

And so on.

Later in the pregnancy, Jenny would panic if she didn't feel the bump kick for a while. Sometimes I could feel movements she couldn't and would reassure her that everything was fine, or take her to the GP so that she could hear the baby's heartbeat through a sonic aid. Some books tell you that you can hear the baby's heartbeat through a bog roll, but I'll be buggered if I could.

Family finances

Pregnancy, of course, got us panicking about money. How were we going to pay for this? How much maternity leave is paid? What paternity leave can I afford to take? Can we move to a bigger house? How much will it cost to have this little sod leeching off us for the next 20-odd years?

We started projecting ahead, thinking about going part-time, and then recoiling with horror when we found out the cost of local nurseries (day-care centres), babysitters and crèches.

We actually found that life became much cheaper. After years of nagging, my wife's 20-a-day smoking habit was kicked immediately (she always threatened that she'd only quit if I knocked her up: she wasn't joking). We were no longer getting through a couple of bottles of wine a night or spending whole Sunday afternoons in the pub, or going out every night.

And, because I felt guilty drinking when she couldn't, those lagers in the fridge would stay untouched for months on end. In our case this led to a rather useful windfall at the end of every month, and a shocking realisation about how much money we'd blown over the years...

And that wedding that we'd been vaguely planning - and dreading the expense of - suddenly turned into a cheap afternoon down the local register office (although the bus ride to the town hall wasn't quite what she had in mind when she dreamed of marriage as a little girl). The thing was that we always wanted to BE married; we were just a bit embarrassed about GETTING married.

As our attentions become more focused, we started getting ultra sensible about our flat. Without the haze of beer bottles and cigarette smoke, we realised that we lived in a complete s••t hole. We started tidying up rather a lot. That crappy kitchen that we'd vowed to change ever since we moved in finally got fitted. That tiling in the bathroom got sorted out at last. The faintest whiff of fatherhood suddenly endowed me with rudimentary DIY skills that had evaded me for years. I suddenly found that I could plaster, paint, damp-proof walls, drill holes and put up shelving.

Body matters

Sex was no problem for the first few months of pregnancy - most of the time, with all those hormones pounding around, Jenny's sexual appetite was as voracious as ever. The only problem was our constant (misplaced) concern that sex would put pressure on the womb and harm the baby - a worry which would sometimes kick in at the most inopportune moment.

In the final months, only two sexual positions seemed possible - doggy and her-on-top. It also became more difficult to cuddle in the same way. As she started to get swollen ankles, dodgy knees and varicose veins, she began to pad herself up with what seemed like a dozen pillows before bedtime. After about 35 weeks I even had to help her put on her shoes and socks.

As her breasts became larger, different problems ensued:

"Are my boobs looking alright?"

"Yes, they look great."

"But you always told me that you preferred small breasts?"

"No, yours always look great."

"But are they better when they're big?"

"Err, no. Yes. Whatever."

It's also worth pointing out that, however great they're looking, antenatal breasts must be handled with extreme care. They do become incredibly sensitive.

My wife was actually more sensitive about her changing body shape than I was. Because I was seeing her every day and because it happened so gradually, I was somewhat immune to even the most extreme changes.

Even when she'd wail that she was the size of a house and had the belly of a darts champion, I tried to assure her that she looked great and was still gorgeous all the time. Why, I'd say, you only have to explore the more extreme titles on any newsagent's top shelf to discover how pregnant women trigger off the strangest carnal impulses in many men...

Strange dreams

For the first few months of the pregnancy, Jenny was completely knackered all the time. She'd come home from work, wolf down her dinner and be in bed by eight o'clock. I found myself doing all the cooking, washing and tidying.

With her in bed by dusk, I'd end up spending countless nights alone watching 'Newsnight' until I realised that this was actually a good opportunity to go out with my friends.

"You can do what you want," said Jenny, regally. "I don't give a toss. I'm going to sleep."

Dreams became complex and surreal for both of us. She had a recurring dream of giving birth to a flat six-inch disc which was then inflated by the midwives into a baby. She also woke me up one night to inform me of a dream in which she could see the outline of a vacuum-packed child on her belly.

Meanwhile, I was having spooky premonitions of looking after a child, dreams which would often end with me waking in sheer terror.

Food thoughts

Morning sickness - or just around tea-time sickness in our case - turns many pregnant women into sophisticated bulimics. Jenny would suddenly disappear into the toilet halfway through a fizzy drink or some creamy food, after which I'd hear a barrage of coughing and retching sounds, which I'd try to politely ignore. Minutes later she'd return and blithely demand to eat the rest of my sandwich.

For the first few months she craved bland food - I found myself making more mashed potato, fish fingers and peas than I'd ever made in my life. I was also alarmed by the amount that she was suddenly capable of eating.

The cardinal rule of any relationship, of course, is that no man should ever make a detrimental remark about his wife's weight. When I found myself making comments like, "Jesus, you're eating a lot of chips, you big fat cow," they didn't go down at all well.

The rule is that pregnancy insulates your wife from all criticism. She can do no wrong, and if she wants to eat a large cod and chips with mushy peas, three slices of bread and butter and added mayonnaise, that is her right. So shut up.

As well as food cravings, she had smell cravings, developing an almost erotic obsession with the odour of Sainsbury's Microban washing-up liquid. This was handy. I think it was the first time that I'd ever seen her do the washing up.

Moody blues

I was warned that all the extra oestrogen pumping around my wife would make her swing violently from Mother Teresa to Charles Manson and back again.

Pregnancy actually turned her from being a hard-nosed, tough-talking, razor-tongued vixen into a soppy, sentimental old fool, who'd start sobbing during RSPCA adverts or episodes of The Simpsons. Obscure children's books, pictures of foetuses and even Kooks by David Bowie would reduce her to tears, as would my comments that she really couldn't get away with wearing that figure-hugging crop top anymore.

Class act

Terrified of looking like some slack baby father, I made a point of rushing out of work early once a week to get to the antenatal classes on time. I actually found them more useful than my wife did - she'd already read widely on the subject, while I sat there like an eager schoolboy soaking up all this new information.

I found myself crossing my legs and wincing in unison with the other men in the class when the midwife discussed vaginal tearing, and contorting in horror when we were given the brutal details of an epidural.

I found it useful to ask plenty of questions. What books can't tell you about is the specifics of your locality - what painkilling drugs your health authority prescribes, what water birth and homebirth provision they offer, what additional classes they offer. Remember to take note when they give details of breathing through the contractions - you can actually be quite useful here.

The drive to hospital

Many expectant fathers become obsessed with driving to hospital. This is their big moment, their cameo role in the drama, and they spend weeks working out the shortest route, finding every possible rush-hour detour, avoiding every speed bump and Gatso camera trap, and then doing a reconnaissance job on the nearest available parking places.

I did all this and then remembered that we didn't actually own a car.

When Jenny's waters broke, we took a minicab to the hospital, with my wife perched on a towel and a plastic sheet, and our birthing ball tucked in the boot. And I'm glad that we did take a cab, because so many other expectant fathers on the early labour ward seemed to expend all their energy demanding parking permits, shouting at the midwives about parking tickets, and rushing out every 15 minutes to move the car.

All this while what their partners needed was someone to act as an advocate: someone to alert the midwives, someone to swear at and say this is your entire fault, you f•••ing b•••••d, through gritted teeth during contractions.

This is the one moment in pregnancy when you can be useful, so don't mess it up by acting like Jeremy Clarkson.

The birth

It was two in the morning when Jenny woke me up and said that her waters had broken. The due date was a week off. I was prepared for this in theory, but all I could think of was my mountain of assignments at work tomorrow. No time for that now. As our cab wound through dark back streets on the way to the hospital, it finally occurred to me that I was going to be a father.

Next was the wait. In our case there was a 36-hour delay between the waters breaking and the contractions starting. That meant 36 hours of plodding around the hospital, sitting on birthing balls and bringing in sandwiches to replace the awful food they were feeding her.

Then the contractions kicked in. Jenny was surprisingly calm and polite between contractions, but then I'd hear the most blood-curdling howl I'd ever heard in my life. You meet ultra-butch, Alpha-male dads who've fainted at this point, and you can understand why fathers used to be barred from births.

But the worst thing is that there's not a lot you can do.

Your instinct is to cuddle your wife, to try and protect her and make the pain go away, but of course it won't. It's horrible. And the last thing she wants is the man who put her through all this telling her, "Don't worry honey, it'll be all right."

Your main role is as an advocate - to convince overworked midwives that your wife's contractions really do hurt, that she's started dilating, that she still wants to stick to her birth plan, and no, she still doesn't want an epidural.

Like bare-knuckle boxing, labour is an endless barrage of noise, blood, shit and bodily fluids. And yes, chances are that there'll be some tearing involved.

I became an auxiliary midwife as my wife was choreographed through more and more improbable birthing positions (on your knees, on your back, bend double, get in these stirrups).

Later, the midwives had me holding up one of my wife's legs at a bizarre angle while I tried not to look at the carnage going on between her legs. Jenny told me afterwards that I worked best as a big, safe, chunky cushion to lean against.

After the most protracted scream I'd ever heard in my life, out it popped. I picked up our wonky-headed, blood-covered, prune-faced little baby, with a furry back and alarmingly hairy ears. The fruit of my loins.

"It's a girl!" I shouted excitedly.

This was a relief. Our boys' names were all rubbish, but we both liked the same girl's name - Lilah. My wife instantly forgot the excruciating pain she'd been in seconds previously.

"Hello Kitty," she gushed as soon as she picked Lilah up. Kitty was what she called the cats. For days afterwards, the midwives thought that the baby was called Kitty. Or Poppet, or Sweet Pea, or Babu, or Biddu, or Chunky, or Chicken. Maybe we'll keep one of these for baby number two.

::23 weeks::

Your baby now weighs a little over one pound / 500 grams and measures about 11.4 inches/ 29 centimetres from crown to heel. Her hearing is well established and she can make out a distorted version of your voice, the beating of your heart and your stomach rumblings. Loud noises often heard in uterus, such as the barking of a dog next door or the roar of a vacuum cleaner probably won't bother your child when she hears them outside the womb. Some studies seem to indicate that the unborn prefer classical music.

In addition to advances in your baby's hearing, her lungs are developing to prepare for breathing. She's swallowing but she normally won't pass her first stool (called meconium) until after birth. If your baby were to be born now, she would have a small chance of survival (about 16 per cent) with the right care. Every day in the womb makes a difference at this stage. If she was born at 24 weeks her chance of survival would rise to 44 per cent.

As for you, you may feel clumsy now that your centre of gravity has shifted. Your gums may bleed when you brush your teeth and your belly button, once an 'innie', may now stick out. Don't worry. It'll revert to its pre-baby state soon after you give birth.

The middle months are a good time to think about a holiday. Find out all you need to know from suntans to vaccinations in our travel section.

What causes stress during pregnancy?

The sources of stress during pregnancy can be wide ranging, from concern about your baby's health and wellbeing, or the impending labour, through to how you'll manage after the birth. It could be that your journey to work is exhausting, or you're anxious about finances and how you are going to afford all the costs involved with a new baby. Whatever it is that's worrying you, there are many positive steps you can take to overcome these feelings.

1. Make time to rest

It's a simple thing, but sometimes it is so difficult to take time out for you. Not only is this good for you, but also extremely good for your baby - so don't feel guilty about 'doing nothing'.

At work, find somewhere to put your feet up and relax during your lunch break and, in the evenings, try to cut down on chores. Leave the laundry until the weekend, and forget about housework for a while. Obviously, if you have a child already it can be hard to find the time to rest, so why not get your husband, a friend or grandparents to amuse them for an afternoon, while you have a well-earned break?

2. Pregnancy yoga

Yoga during pregnancy not only helps tone your body, but the relaxation techniques that will assist you in labour can have a beneficial effect during pregnancy. If you are prone to feel the anxiety or have experienced panic attacks, practising your breathing techniques can really help. Ask the yoga instructor at your nearest gym if she knows of a reputable pregnancy yoga class in your area.

3. Talk about it

If you are worried about whether your baby is healthy or whether he will be born safely, you're certainly not alone. Talking about these concerns will really help, whether it's with your husband, mother or a friend who already has children. Other women at the same stage of pregnancy as you, perhaps at your prenatal or parent craft class will undoubtedly share your concerns. Your doctor or prenatal class instructor can also reassure you.

You should also know that the Health Ministry has statistics that show women giving birth in Malaysia are safer today than they have ever been before (30 in 100,000 die in childbirth or from related complications compared to 530 in 100,000 in 1955). In fact, our method of lowering maternal mortality rate is held up as a model for other developing countries.

4. Relaxation and complementary therapies

Massage in pregnancy is a fantastic way to de-stress. Find an experienced masseuse who is trained in pregnancy massage. If one is not available, a neck and upper back massage can still be very soothing. There are also lots of books on the market with tips and advice on how massage can help you relax.

If you are using aromatherapy or essential oils, it's important to make sure they are safe for use in pregnancy as some are not suitable for the first or third trimester. Oils safe for use after 20 weeks include most lavender oils, citrus oils and ylang ylang, but you should check with a qualified aroma therapist.

Reflexology is also a lovely way to relax, but again, make sure the therapist is qualified in working with pregnant women. 'There is no evidence of reflexology triggering miscarriage,' says Denise Tiran, principal lecturer in complementary medicine and midwifery at the University of Greenwich in London. However, she does emphasise the need to find a good, experienced and reputable reflexologist.

Meditation and positive visualisation techniques can also help. Meditation is a way of relaxing by concentrating on a mental focus, and positive visualisation is a technique for releasing anxieties by creating an inner picture of a peaceful scene. You can find books which show you how to relax in this way if you haven't tried it before. Buy some special relaxation tapes to play in the background - great for helping your mind switch off. Choose a time when you know you won't be disturbed and try to give yourself at least 30 minutes.

5. Preparing for the birth

You may be worrying about the impending labour and how you will cope with the pain, whether you will make a fool of yourself or how your husband will cope. Find out about the mechanics of labour as well as the physical and emotional aspects of each phase by signing up for prenatal classes, reading books and magazines and gathering information from BabyCenter. Being informed will help you feel more confident and in control.

It will also help to visit the labour and delivery rooms beforehand, so that you know what to expect.

For a few women, the fear of childbirth can be so overwhelming that they would rather have a caesarean section than a normal delivery. This fear is known as 'tocophobia' and is not uncommon. Tell your obstetrician about your fears. Research has shown this can be helped with the right counselling and support.

6. Relationship changes

It's perfectly understandable to worry about how having a baby will affect your relationship with your husband or how you will cope as a parent. Parenting is something you learn along the way and often there is no right or wrong way to do things, you just have to do what feels right for you. Try and spend some time with a friend who has a young baby to pick up some useful tips and ideas. Talk to your husband about the changes ahead so you will both understand each other's expectations and fears.

7. Commuting strategies

Like a lot of women these days, you may plan on working until just a few weeks before your due date because you want more time off with your baby after he's born. Commuting in our cities' traffic-choked roads is one of the major sources of stress for expectant mums and one which is made worse the more heavily pregnant you are.

Ask your employer if you can avoid rush hours, particularly if you use public transport. Perhaps starting work earlier and finishing earlier would be possible or even working from home one or two days a week.

Make sure you always sit down while travelling and if you are not offered a seat you should ask for one. Don't feel embarrassed - it's really not safe to be swinging around in a train, LRT or bus - and most people are more than willing to give up their seats, they just need to be reminded sometimes!

8. Money matters

The knock-on effect of having a baby is the dent it makes in your finances. If you are worried about how you are going to afford everything, make a list of the items you need - in order of priority - then decide which ones you could borrow from friends or family. It really isn't necessary to buy everything, particularly when some items - such as a Moses basket - are often only used for a couple of months.

Make sure you get your full entitlement of maternity leave and pay. Find out what it is from your HR department and don't be afraid to seek further help if you need more advice.

9. Diet and exercise

Eating calming nutrients can help suppress the hormones that rise at times of stress. Foods containing B vitamins, such as yeast extract, wholegrain bread and wholegrain rice, increase your levels of the anti-stress hormone serotonin. Ensuring that you eat well in pregnancy is very important.

Physical exercise also has proven benefits in terms of relieving tension, so continue with the exercise you did before you were pregnant -- so long as it is safe for you to do so. If you're in any doubt, check with your doctor. If you attend exercise classes, always inform your instructor that you are pregnant.

Swimming is the perfect exercise for pregnancy as it keeps you toned and healthy, without being too hard on your joints, although be careful with excessive breaststroke as it may cause backache. Aquarobic classes for pregnant women are also a fun way of keeping fit. Do join in if you can find a class as they are rare even in our major cities.

At work, make sure you get up and walk around regularly, especially if your job is mainly desk-bound, and pop out at lunchtime for some fresh air, even if it's only for 10 minutes.

10. Treat yourself

Laughter is one of the body's best ways of relaxing, so meet up with some friends or go to the cinema and see the latest comedy. Go on a weekend break and make the most of your time with just you and your husband, or treat yourself to a spa that offers treatments for pregnant women.

Pregnancy is also the perfect time to treat yourself to all those beauty treatments you never normally splash out on. When your bump gets too big for you to cut your toenails, enjoy regular pedicures, instead.

Be nice to yourself - you deserve it.

Pregnancy Vocabulary : C—Colostrum

Got milk? The thin fluid known as colostrums often begins filling the breasts even before baby is born. Rich in antibodies, colostrums is the precursor to breast milk and helps a baby's tiny body defend against infection.

— co·los·tral \-trÉ™l\ adjective

(thefreedictionary.com)

colostrum [kəˈlɒstrəm] n

(Medicine / Gynaecology & Obstetrics) the thin milky secretion from the nipples that precedes and follows true lactation. It consists largely of serum and white blood cells

[from Latin, of obscure origin]

colostral adj

(Merriam-webster.com)

Colostrums (also known as beestings or first milk) is a form of milk produced by the mammary glands in late pregnancy and the few days after giving birth. Human and bovine colostrums are thick, sticky and yellowish.

In humans, it has high concentrations of nutrients and antibodies, but it is small in quantity. Colostrums is high in carbohydrates, high in protein, high in antibodies, and low in fat (as human newborns may find fat difficult to digest).

Newborns have very small digestive systems, and colostrums deliver its nutrients in a very concentrated low-volume form. It has a mild laxative effect, encouraging the passing of the baby's first stool, which is called meconium. This clears excess bilirubin, a waste product of dead red blood cells which is produced in large quantities at birth due to blood volume reduction, from the infant's body and helps prevent jaundice. Colostrums contains large numbers of antibodies called "secretory immunoglobulin" (IgA) that help protect the mucous membranes in the throat, lungs, and intestines of the infant.

Leukocytes are also present in large numbers; these begin protecting the infant from harmful viruses and bacteria. Ingesting colostrums establishes beneficial bacteria in the digestive tract. Premature babies tend to fare better on human colostrums than commercial infant formulas.

Human milk contains special components, called growth modulators, that help the premature baby's digestive system adjust to oral feedings. Research indicates that premature babies fed formula tend to vomit more and continue tube feeding longer than those fed human colostrums and breast milk.

Pregnancy Vocabulary : B—Braxton Hicks

At various times during pregnancy, sometimes starting around 20 weeks, the body practices contractions. Known as Braxton Hicks, these contractions occur randomly. They may be uncomfortable but they're not usually painful—and they don't dilate and efface the cervix as real contractions do.

Braxton-Hicks contractions are basically practice contractions, and are the body's way of preparing for labour. Some experts believe that they help to thin and soften the cervix, which is necessary for birth.

A woman experiencing a Braxton-Hicks contraction will feel irregular and infrequent tightening of her uterus, which will last between one and two minutes. They occur on a totally random and sporadic basis, and their unpredictability makes them different to regular contractions.

Although they start at around six weeks of pregnancy, a woman will not normally feel a Braxton-Hicks contraction until the third trimester, but it is possible to feel them sooner than this. Additionally, while many women experience Braxton-Hicks contractions, it is not unusual for a women to bypass this experience altogether. Braxton-Hicks can feel quite uncomfortable, although some women do say they can be painful and can feel like the real thing.

However, they differ from true labour contractions as they will often go away if a woman changes activity, such as getting up from sitting down, or going for a walk. Labour contractions cannot be halted by these types of measures. Braxton-Hicks are a part of pregnancy and therefore not a cause for concern. However, if they are accompanied by other symptoms such as bleeding, loss of water or a slowing down in your baby's movements, you must seek immediate medical help.

As early as six weeks into all pregnancies, the uterus, which is a large muscle, begins to contract rhythmically. These contractions (called Braxton Hicks contractions or `False labor`) are usually irregular and painless. Because they usually do not cause the cervix to dilate, they do not threaten the pregnancy. They generally last about one to two minutes. While these contractions might be noticed during the second half of pregnancy, some women don't notice them at all.

Throughout the pregnancy, the uterus periodically contracts to facilitate better blood flow through the placenta and the foetus. Braxton Hicks contractions help to strengthen the uterine muscles and prepare them for the normal labour process.

3) Management

(a) Determine the frequency and duration of the contractions.

(b) Expectant mothers are encouraged to rest on their side.

(c) Deep, relaxing breathing.

4) Indicators to refer the client to your OB care provider.

(a) Contractions coming with any regular frequency or occurring within 20 minutes of each other should be reported.

(b) Severe pain should be referred to your OB care provider.

(c) Any gush or leaking of fluid from the vagina is an indication that your OB care provider should be called.

(d) Blood showing in vaginal secretions should be referred to your OB care provider.

(e) Burning or pain during urination need to be discussed as well.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Senarai makanan serta hikmahnya

Roti (khubz)

- Roti yang paling bagus ialah diperbuat daripada gandum yang baik dimasak dalam pembakar roti yang bulat. Roti itu dibiarkan sejuk sebelum dimakan, jika tidak kita akan merasa haus bila memakannya. Roti yang sudah lama dan tidak elok akan menyebukan perut. Roti yang terdapat sekam gandum mudah dicernakan. Nabi s.a.w. pernah bersabda “Jangan potong roti dengan pisau, hormatilah roti itu dengan memotong dengan tanganmu kerana Allah menghormati roti itu”.

Jintan Manis (anisun)

- Jintan manis banyak khasiatnya ianya melegakan kesakitan dalam badan, melancarkan aliran keluar haid, membanyakkan susu dan membuang gas dalam usus. Ianya juga boleh digunakan dalam bentuk serbuk dan disapu disekeliling mata bagi menguatkan pandangan mata.

Epal (tuffah)

- Epal yang masam lebih sejuk daripada yang manis. Ianya juga boleh menguatkan organ hati.

Asparagus (hiyawn)

- Asparagus berkhasiat bagi membuka sekatan pada buah pinggang dan memudahkan kelahiran anak.

Pisang (mawz)

- Pisang boleh menyejukkan badan dan ianya boleh dimakan dengan madu lebah.

Barli (sya’ir)

- Barli berkhasiat sebagai penyejuk badan. Rasulullah s.a.w. pernah memberi sup barli kepada orang yg mengidap demam.

Selasih (manis rayhan)

- Selasih berkhasiat untuk menguatkan organ hati, memudahkan tidur dengan cara menyapu kepala dengan basil yang dicampurkan air.

Mentega (zubdah)

- Mentega khasiatnya memanas dan melembapkan. Baik untuk menghilangkan sembelit. Mentega yang dicampurkan dengan kurma dan madu sejenis makanan yang menghilangkan rasa mengidam pada perempuan hamil.

Bunga kubis (qunnabit)

- Sayuran ini sukar dihadam dan bahaya untuk penglihatan.

Chamomile (babunaj)

- Kegunaan chamomile ialah melancarkan aliran haid dan kencing. Ianya juga sangat berguna untuk memanaskan badan.

Lobak merah

- Kegunaannya memanaskan badan. Ianya juga melancarkan aliran haid dan air kencing.

Biji kopi (qahwah)

- Sebagai ubat penyakit buang air besar berdarah, menghilangkan dahaga dan dikatakan menimbulkan kebijaksanaan.

Biji hitam (habb al sauda)

- Dilaporkan bahawa Nabi s.a.w. pernah bersabda “Jadilah seperti biji habb al sauda kerana biji ini ubat semua penyakit kecuali kanser dan mati”. Adalah dilaporkan juga bahawa Allah Taala menunjukkan bahawa “ia” itu ialah hab al sauda menghapuskan angin dalam usus dan demam. Baik untuk merawat ‘leukoderma’ dan membuka saluran urat yang halus. Berguna untuk menghilangkan penyakit selesema.

Ayam (dajaj)

- Memudahkan penghadaman. membetulkan imbangan badan, baik untuk otak dan badan, serta mencantikkan rupa paras. Walau bagaimanapun jika dimakan terlalu banyak boleh menyebabkan penyakit sendi dan yang terbaik ialah daging ayam betina yang tidak bertelur.

Kulit kayu manis (darchini)

- Kulit kayu manis juga merupakan pemanas badan. Minyaknya sebagai penawar untuk menghapuskan rasa tidak hadam. Ia merupakan campuran (rempah ratus) yang digunakan dalam resepi masakan hampir tiga suku penduduk dunia.

Limau kulit tebal, warna kuning pucat, kurang mengandungi asid (utrujj)

- Nabi Muhammad s.a.w. pernah bersabda, “Limau ini adalah seperti mukmin: bagus dirasa dan bagus dihidu”. Limau ini menguatkan organ hati serta dapat menjauhkan kesedihan dan bintik-bintik pada kulit, menghapuskan kelaparan dan melambatkan pengaliran dalam hempedu.

Timun (qitta’)

- Yang masak menghilangkan panas dan menggalakkan pembuangan air kecil. Makan kurma dengan timun muda menambahkan berat badan.

Jintan putih (kammun)

- Jintan putih khasiatnya untuk memanaskan badan. Jintan putih yang direndam di dalam air dan diminum adalah baik untuk mengubat perut yang memulas.

Tamar kering (tamr)

- Nabi s.a.w. pernah bersabda, “Rumah yang tiada tamar atau kurma adalah rumah yg tiada bermakanan”. Nabi s.a.w. sendiri pernah menanam kurma atau tamar. Kurma hendaklah dimakan dengan badam untuk menghapuskan parut yang tidak diingini.

Terung (badhijan)

- Terung hitam menyebabkan keluarnya hempedu. Kecenderungan benda ini mengeluarkan hempedu dapat dibetulkan dengan memakannya bersama daging.

Telur (baydah)

- Khasiat telur yang paling baik boleh kita dapati daripada telur ayam (setengah masak atau masak) bukan direbus keras. Putih telur melegakan apabila kita melecur atau kulit terbakar dan menghilangkan parut pada kulit.

“Endive” (hindiba)

- Khasiat hindiba berubah mengikut musim. Hindiba’ pada awal musim adalah yang paling baik dan yang dipenghujungnya sudah tidak berkhasiat lagi. Hadith menyatakan “makanlah hindiba dan janganlah bersendawa kerana sesungguhnya tidak ada satu hari pun titisan air syurga tidak jatuh ke atas hindiba”.

Fenugreek (Hulbah)

- Nabi s.a.w. pernah bersabda “jika umatku tahu apa yang ada pada hulbah, mereka pasti membeli dan membayarnya dengan emas”. Antara khasiat hulbah membantu pengaliran haid dan berguna untuk menyembuhkan sakit perut (memulas).

Buah Ara fig (fin)

- Fin kering adalah yang terbaik. Di antara khasiatnya ialah untuk memanaskan badan dan rasanya enak. Nabi s.a.w. pernah bersabda, “Jika anda kata ada buah datang dari syurga maka itulah fin kerana sebenarnya inilah buah syurga”. Oleh itu makanlah buah fin kerana khasiatnya menyembuhkan penyakit buasir dan pirai.

Ikan (samak)

- Khasiat ikan air tawar lebih baik terutama yang makan tumbuh tumbuhan, bukan yang makan lumpur dan benda-benda seni dalam air. Ikan yang tidak dimasak sukar dihadam dan mengeluarkan ketidakseimbangan badan

Bawang putih (thum)

- Bawang putih juga elok untuk memanaskan badan. Khasiatnya membuang gas dan menggalakkan pengeluaran air mani. Baik untuk pembawakan sejuk, untuk mencairkan balgham. Minyaknya digunakan untuk merawat gigitan serangga dan Nabi s.a.w pernah bersabda “Sesiapa yang memakan pohon ini maka janganlah dia mendekati kami dan janganlah sembahyang bersama bersama kami.”

Minyak sapi (samn)

- Minyak sapi mengandungi banyak lemak. Ia dianggap sebagai penawar racun. Campurkan dengan manisan lalu dimakan dan ianya dipercayai ubat pada makanan.

Halia (zanjabil)

- Halia disebut dalam ayat alQuran (ayat 17, Surah Al Insan) firman Allah Taala yang bermaksud “Dan mereka dalam Syurga itu, diberi dari sejenis minuman yang campurannya dari zanjabil”. Khasiatnya membantu penghadaman dan memanaskan badan.

Inai (hinna)

- Terdapat banyak khasiat pada inai. Antaranya menghilangkan bekas calar-calar atau lebam pada badan, menghilangkan sakit kepala, sakit dalam kaki, sakit kuku dan mengelokkan rambut. Inai bersifat sangat panas dan menerbitkan perasaan cinta. Wangian yang terbaik ialah yang diperbuat dari bunga inai. Memakai inai pada kuku, tangan dan kaki menjadi biasaan masyarakat di Timur terutama bagi pengantin baru.

Madu lebah(a’sal)

- Madu lebah mempunyai berbagai-bagai khasiat. Madu atau manisan lebah ini apabila dicampur dengan air panas boleh mengubati penyakit cirit birit. Sabda Nabi s.a.w., “Demi Allah yang aku dalam genggaman Nya, minumlah madu. Malaikat akan memohon rahmat pada penghuni rumah yang ada madu di dalamnya. Jika seseorang itu makan madu, seribu ubat masuk keperutnya dan sejuta penyakit keluar darinya.” Rasulullah sendiri mengamalkan meminum madu, dengan meminum segelas air yang dicampurkan dengan madu setiap pagi ketika perut kosong. Madu dianggap ibu segala makanan, minuman dan ubatan. Madu yang paling berkualiti ialah madu yang dikeluarkan dalam musim bunga (spring), seterusnya dalam musim panas (summer) dan yang kurang berkualiti adalah madu yang dihasilkan dalam musim sejuk (winter).

Kekacang (a’das)

- Semua kekacang mengeluarkan kekeringan. Jenis-jenis kekacang hendaklah dimakan sedikit kerana kalau dimakan dengan banyak ianya tidak baik untuk perut. Ada hadith mengatakan bahawa sesiapa memakan kekacang akan menerbitkan hati yang simpati, mata berair dan menghapuskan kesombongan.

Salad (khass)

- Meskipun ianya sejuk, ia dianggap sayuran yang baik untuk dimakan. Ia melembutkan tubuh yang keras dan membantu menyembuhkan penyakit gangguan mental. Salad melemahkan tenaga batin dan terlalu banyak memakannya juga melemahkan penglihatan.

Daging (lahm)

- Daging mengandungi banyak khasiat. Dikatakan bahawa orang yang memakan daging selama 40 hari berturut-turut tidak akan mendatangkan kebaikan. Dan orang yang tidak memakan daging selama 40 hari berturut-turut juga tidak akan mendatangkan kebaikan. Dengan kata lain makanlah daging secara sederhana. Daging yang paling baik ialah daging kambing. Ianya bersifat panas dan lembab. Daging kambing yang paling baik ialah daging kambing jantan yang berumur satu hingga dua tahun.

Adapun daging babi haram dimakan. Terdapat pertelingkahan pendapat mengenai daging kuda sebagai makanan biasa. Ibnu Sina berpendapat bahawa daging unta, kuda, keldai adalah tidak baik dimakan sebagai makanan biasa. Syariat juga melarang memakan daging binatang pemangsa. Dilarang memakan daging binatang pemangsa yang kukunya mencengkam dan menyangkuk.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Baby Shower Planning Steps :: 2nd Part::

How can you throw an unforgettable shower without an over-the-top budget and round-the-clock planning? Host a baby shower to remember with these fun and easy tips.

Throwing a baby shower is one of the nicest gifts you can give to an expectant mom. It can be the perfect time for a mom-to-be to celebrate with friends and share the joy and anticipation of becoming of mother. We've all seen the standard shower full of yellow rubber duckies and diaper derbies. Now that it's your turn to play hostess, why not have some fun and get creative? Here some ideas to get you started.

Theme

Every party needs direction, and a great theme can tie everything together.

1. Mom Themes: Think about what the mom-to-be's hobbies and passions are. For instance, if the expectant mom is a huge sports team fan, create a shower that combines baby items with team colours and mascots (baby booties in team colours and tiny jerseys, for example).

2. Baby Themes: "Decorations can be a major element for a more unusual shower," says Sherri Foxman, AKA the "Party Girl" and founder of Party411. "We have used disposable diapers as napkins, tied with ribbon, of course; filled baby shoes with candy at each table (don't worry the baby will grow into them); and created personalized labels for baby food with the mom's picture (put one at each place setting)." You can also include a baby blanket tablecloth, hanging mobile centrepiece, and small baby bottle flower arrangements for some added baby fun.

3. Sleep Over: If some of mom's favourite guests are coming from out of town, throw a girlfriends slumber party just like you did when you were kids. This time you can host it at a local bed and breakfast or spa hotel. What a great chance to catch up before the new arrival!

4. Home Spa: A new trend in spa parties is the home visit. Spa professionals can come to the party and give everyone massages, facials, and manicures. This way an indulgent spa touch can be added to a traditional shower, and guests don't have to travel to another locale.

5. Walk on the Wild Side: Freshen up the party by moving it outdoors. Check out local scenic parks or gardens for possible party locales. This is especially nice if mom enjoys nature or gardening, or if there is a large crowd.

6. Paint by Numbers: For a lively, activity-based party, have everyone meet at a "paint your own" pottery studio. Guests can each make a special piece for the new family, such as plates, vases, and commemorative items. Everyone will have fun and the mom-to-be will have a full set of custom baby tableware with which to remember the day.

7. Shopping: What better way to spend the day with girlfriends than a day out shopping? Plan a special day out at a cool shopping district or mall. Decide on a great place for lunch and request everyone bring gift cards to the nearby stores, so the mom-of-honour can have fun shopping with everyone. (This also saves guests from the trouble of registries and gift-wrap.)

8. Keep it Close: A core group of friends and family can sometimes be more enjoyable than a huge room full of people, especially if the mom-to-be is uncomfortable in a crowd. Throw a low-key shower with a small group. Look through photo albums, make special crafts or start a baby scrapbook, rent a movie (BabyZone staff favourites on having a baby are here!), order take-out, and just spend some quality time together.

9. Office Space: Surprise the expectant mom by decorating her cubicle or office with baby-themed items. Focus on ways everyone can make her work time easier during her transition to motherhood. Give her a thoughtful or funny memento to remember everyone while on maternity leave, such as a mini scrapbook or recording of her co-workers singing a lullaby.

Delightful Decorating

Looking for new decorating ideas? Try these for a bit of added ambiance.

10. Colour, Colour and Colour: Blue, pink, and yellow have always been the standards for shower decorations. Make a bold choice by shying away from these colours and going with a more brilliant style. Colours that make a pop can be jewel tones like purple and gold or lush colours like moss green and rose.

11. A Little Bit of Country: Decorations with delicate bunches of lavender, white linen tablecloths, and potpourri-filled bowls add a sophisticated but homey touch.

12. A Touch of Class: Add sophisticated touches, like fresh flowers, elegant trays of patisserie finger foods, and candles in varying heights.

13. Celebrate the Seasons: Play off the season—vibrant oranges and reds for summer, light shades of green for spring, rich yellows and gold for fall, and crisp white and blue for winter.

Party Patrol

Remember your first priority should be to the guest of honour. During the shower, try these little steps to greatly increase mom-to-be's enjoyment.

14. A Sense of Place: Design a special seating area where she can open presents, read cards, and participates in activities. The sitting space can be decorated in the theme of the party, but should also be comfy and roomy.

15. Crowd Control: As the hostess, keep your eye out for any tensions or unfavourable feelings from the mom-to-be or guests. If someone is stealing the spotlight or being rude, switch gears and quietly request a change in behaviour.

16. The Doting Host: Look for cues that the expectant mom needs a break. If the shower is outdoors, make sure it is not too hot and that your guests have a sufficient supply of drinks and food.

Party Outside the Box

Try these out-of-the-box ideas for an original and fun baby shower.

17. Head Shots: Ask guests to bring baby pictures. Have you ever played the standard baby shower game of matching the baby photo to the guest? Add this fun twist: instead of just labelling names, have guests write quote bubbles next to the pictures. The quotes can answer a question, like "What do I want to be when I grow up?" Then afterward read the blurbs to everyone for some good laughs.

18. Crash the Party: Invite unexpected guests, like childhood friends, professors, or former co-workers. Make sure the guests would be a welcome surprise.

19. Male Invasion: Encourage the men to come to the party. Sometimes throwing in the opposite sex can lead to a more entertaining shower. Isn't it always more fun to laugh at the guys trying out baby food or competing in a bottle-sucking race?

20. The Entertainer: Host some entertainment, like a local jazz band or amateur violinist. The music will add another layer to the party and provide a nice backdrop for conversation.

21. Let There Be Kids: Many women have difficulty finding child care, and what could say "Welcome Baby" more than the laughter of children? Create a special spot for kids; set up with toys, books, and kid-friendly snacks.

22. Go Virtual: Host an online shower. Websites like www.webbabyshower.com offer a virtual party experience that is great for moms who live far away or who are on bed rest. Complete with printable keepsakes, party games, and registry links for easy online shopping, this idea will probably only get more popular.

23. After the Fact: So what do you do if you're a mom who doesn't know if a shower will be thrown for you? "In this day and age," says Foxman, "it is completely appropriate to approach a close friend or family member and ask them to host a shower. Another option ... wait until after the baby is born and have a 'coming out' party so it doesn't seem like you're throwing yourself a shower. This would be much more appropriate," adds Foxman.

24. Video Shower: "If the mom-to-be is in a new area and hasn't made new friends, and family isn't close by, we've been known to host 'video' showers," says Foxman. "Everyone sends gifts and someone video tapes the proceedings and mails everyone a copy! Ahh ... the electronic age!"

Final Advice

And finally ... some advice for the hostess:

25. R-E-L-A-X: "As for any party," says Foxman, "relax. Many hostesses get stressed out because they want to make such a good impression. People generally have a great time when they get together, especially for a party as happy as a baby shower. Make your guest list, choose the space based on the number of guests, pick a theme ... and go for it!"

Baby Shower Planning Steps

Throwing a baby shower for a best girlfriend, co-worker, or sister can be a lot of fun. But it can also be a lot of work and stress for the host. How can you throw an unforgettable shower without an over-the-top budget and 'round the clock planning?

Looking for original ideas to enhance your best friend's baby shower? From fun foods to giving the right gift, these 25 terrific tips will make any baby shower memorable for the mom-to-be and guests.

Fabulous Food: Create a Theme

1. Baby Shower Buffet: Buffets are great for ease of use and presentation. Have fun with the menu and get creative. Offer a variety of high-quality Thai take-out, plates of Italian antipasti, a salad buffet, a selection of tropical fruits, or assemble a delicious collection of French pastries.

2. Cake Creativity: Fun baby-themed cakes can easily be made with a few standard cake pans—how about a diaper, baby bottle, or bootie cake? For a super-easy cake, just use a round cake pan and draw a big baby's face on the cake top.

3. Baby Food Fun: Ask guests to bring foods that they have named in a baby theme or use items with the word "baby" in them, such as baby snap peas and carrots.

4. Get Fruity: Healthy and easy to prepare and serve, fruits make for a pretty presentation. Try a spiralled fruit tart with various sliced fruits circled in a pastry shell and drizzled with a sweet glaze.

5. Easy Potluck: New moms are grateful for healthy recipes that are simple and tasty. Arrange easy-to-make dishes your guests can bring for you all to enjoy, and combine the recipes in a binder for the guest of honour.

Party Planner: Give Guests Something to Do

6. Game Time: The Internet is filled with baby shower games. There are games you can buy (Baby Bingo, Baby Shower Scratch Off, etc.) or games you can do on your own (diapering blindfolded, identifying baby pictures of guests that they bring with them). Research the party games that will best suit your audience, whether tame and silly, or intellectual.

7. Innovative Party Favours: Instead of toiling away constructing cute party favours, supply your guests with inexpensive craft packets of fun projects such as a sachet, painted flowerpots, or simple jewellery.

8. Party with Purpose: "If you stage an activity it always makes for a better time," shares Foxman. "We recently planned a scrapbooking shower where everyone put a page together at the shower itself. They had a ball." To throw your own scrapbooking shower, supply the materials for the pages or ask guests to bring materials to make their page as part of the shower.

9. Charity Crafts: Does your guest of honour have a really generous heart? Throw a shower that celebrates her new arrival and helps many other babies, too. An even easier charity idea is to collect a toy or supply at the door for donation.

10. Conversation Starters: Buy a pre-made conversation game or make up your own questions about parenthood, babies, and pregnancy. Just ask a group of moms about labour and you're sure to get an earful!

11. Take a Test: Use an online quiz website and print out copies of especially themed tests, which can include such topics as children's nursery rhymes to popular names and baby stats. Give a prize to the winner!

Great Gift Giving: Tried and True Ideas

12. Online Registries: Make gift registries easy on guests by choosing a conventional store that also has a secure online registry, giving them more options for choosing that perfect present.

13. Personalize It: New parents love personalization! A simple hand-painted toy box with the baby's name or initialized socks and onesies make for classic gifts.

14. Make it Memorable: Make a memory of the day by documenting the event. Use a camcorder, camera, and journal to record all the gifts, guests, and goings on.

15. Sage Advice: Ask each guest for parenting advice. Compile all the quotes into a pretty book that can be labeled for Mom and kept as a useful keepsake.

16. Mom-to-Be's Baby Days: Research what the mom-to-be was like as a baby and create a mini-presentation. Discuss her habits, tantrums, and messiest moments, all accompanied by pictures. Store your notes and photos in an album for the new mama to share with her little ones.

17. Homemade Heirlooms: Make an heirloom-quality quilt, christening dress, or petticoat. Embroider the baby's name and birth date (or christening date) on the item and offer to embroider the same information for each successive recipient.

18. Baby Bathtub Gift Basket: Assemble bath-time items in a baby bathtub. Wrap the filled tub with a large sheet of cellophane, tie it with a colourful bow, and top it with an adorable rubber duck.

19. Nursery Gift Basket: Decorate a basket or even buy a sturdy laundry basket or hamper and fill it with nursery supplies contributed by the guests.

20. Flex Your Buying Power: Ask baby shower guests to contribute to the purchase of major baby gear item, such as a crib, bassinet, cradle, high chair, stroller, or portable play yard.

21. Spa Time for Mom-to-Be: In the parade of strollers and layette gifts, sometimes Mom is forgotten. Bubble bath, gourmet chocolate bars, a pretty candle, and a few coupons for babysitting bring a smile to any tired new mother's face. Add some soothing music for late night feedings and some chic outfits specifically designed for breastfeeding moms.

22. Hospital Readiness Kit: Make Mom's time in the hospital comfy and stylish by giving her specially designed birthing loungewear. Add other touches like soft slippers, massage oils, and a stylish overnight bag.

23. Stick to the Classics: Silver rattles, spoons, porringers, mirrors, or other items engraved with the baby's initials and the date of birth are treasured keepsakes.

24. Picture Perfect: Compile a memory book with pictures of the baby's parents, brothers, sisters, and relatives. And remember, new parents can never have too many picture frames.

25. Book Club: Ask each guest to bring a favourite book from her childhood or a favourite story of her child's to create a library for baby-to-be. Don't forget to include a few parenting nonfiction staples.